To Say Never

[zopyrus]

Title: To Say Never
Challenge/Prompt: Symbol
Original Fiction
Rating: G
Warnings: none
Disclaimer: my story
Summary: She's the only person he can't just tell a joke to.


Most of my friends were older than me, so they knew already. Or they were very young, like my nephew, and only wanted a tale before bed.

Hippothoe asked because nobody had explained it well enough. My brave sister, proud of me, but jealous too, wanted to know what it was like to fight in a war.

Poets use metaphors to say what can’t be said, and they don’t ever lose their words.  (But to say “never” is to make a thing happen.)  I stood before her, tongue-tied like a child, trying to tell her something more than a story.

Comments

[ieune]

Oo--interesting scene you have there. I particularly like the last two sentences--how true about saying never-- and I empathise with the tongue-tied thing.

I'm getting a Spartan feel from this drabble. Am I close? :)

[zopyrus]

Oh, so close! But the Spartans are the bad guys--my characters are Athenian. =D

[ieune]

Ah, right! :D Cool.

Back on LJ, there was a another writer I knew a little who was working on a Spartan fic, and she had a real thing for scars. I just didn't get it. I find Sparta too harsh.

[meoryn]

This was really good. The prose flows so well in this and I love the ending.

[sterling]

One gets a good feel for the relationship between the siblings here. It flows nicely and creates a clear atmosphere. Nice job!

[iamfiction]

I second the love for the last two sentences here.

[evenstar]

This is a lovely bittersweet little snapshot. It's difficult to convey a mood of that sort in such a short piece, but you did so really well.